Young Adults in College During School Breaks

Addressing the Feeling of Isolation 

Isolation can occur for both those who are stuck in their college town and those who go back home for their break. You might feel like you want to stay in and sleep to avoid the feeling of loneliness, but it’s important to recognize when you need to reach out for support. Thanks to technology, there are many ways to stay connected even when you are physically cities, states and, in some cases, countries apart. 

Ways to stay connected

Make time for video chats to catch up with your friends. Pick a time and day that you will all make time for the call. 

• Attend virtual hangouts where you can all do an activity together! 
• Playing video games. 
• Painting. 
• Drawing. 
• Playing virtual card games, like Say It Out Loud! 

Can’t agree on one option? Do your own individual activities and enjoy having the company virtually. 

Want to try something old school? You can send each other pen pal letters talking about your week and include fun stickers or confetti to make it unique to you and your friend. Alternatively, you also can make a digital letter through online programs and email the finished product to your friend. 

Want to try and build your network and community? Try engaging in local events and volunteering at local organizations. 

If you feel like you need additional support or feel like you can’t talk to your friends or family about how you’re feeling, you can reach out to the NAMI HelpLines.

Establishing Boundaries and Expectations 

Being home on break could bring on responsibilities that you did not have to think about when you were in school. Your parents might ask you to be a lot more involved in supporting your family through more chores, taking care of your younger siblings, or helping out with a family business. It’s important to talk with your family to establish boundaries and expectations. This might be easier said than done, as each family has its own cultural perspectives on expectations in the home. If you feel safe to have the conversation, below are some tips on how to facilitate it. 

If your parents are new to understanding the importance of boundaries, you can walk them through our Boundaries info sheet. You can also talk to them about what they feel their boundaries are and make it more of an open conversation. You can discuss things like: 

• What does your parent feel is necessary to support their stress? 
• What do you feel will support you in your mental health in preparing for the next semester? 
• What does making time for you both look like? 
• What does being supported look like to both of you? 

More examples are available in the Teens section. 

Once you establish what boundaries are important to you, you can then think about flexibility and how you will work together to build your expectations for what your time on break from school looks like. If you need additional support and have access to a therapist, this may be a topic you can discuss with them to prepare what you’d like to say or to work through differing expectations. 

Self-Care When Seeing Family 

School breaks include holidays when families get together. For some, it can be nerve-wracking to see certain family members for various reasons. Not everyone can feel safe to voice their concerns or to avoid seeing those family members. Here is a list of potential strategies to support yourself: 

• Make plans to leave early. If possible, arrange a time for you to leave the gathering for another “engagement.” You have a party to attend, must visit a friend from out of town, or whatever reason you think would be reasonable to leave early. 
• Can’t leave early? Talk to a trusted family member, or bring a friend who will support you and have your back. You can come up with code words to help you get out of uncomfortable situations or to help de-escalate a potential activation. 
• Take a break by going to the bathroom and resetting. If needed, try some breathing exercises or calling a friend. 
• Avoid feeding into topics that you know will escalate due to different views and opinions. Think of some ways to redirect the conversation to something less controversial if possible. Talk with another trusted family member to help you come up with some strategies. 
• If possible, try to keep your interactions limited to avoid activation or feeling uncomfortable. You can try to redirect by mentioning you need to talk with another family member about something. 

After stressful encounters, plan some time for yourself to help you feel better or debrief. 

• Get yourself a small treat. 
• Schedule a call with a friend. 
• Schedule your next therapist appointment to be the day after your interaction. 

Additionally, if you need immediate support, you can access helplines, which are staffed with live trained people you can chat with. 

Prioritize Yourself

No matter the reason that a family member causes stress, anxiety or even fear, it is important to prioritize yourself and your needs. Not everyone’s family will understand the need to not be around certain family members, but now that you are becoming/are an adult, you can work toward creating boundaries that support your mental health. 

Supporting Your Mental Wellness

During the school year, you might experience burnout and fall off of practices that support your mental health. Now that you don’t have to worry about exams and busy class schedules, you can pick up some good habits that you can try to carry with you into the next school semester! If you’re interested in picking up some new habits, consider trying some of these activities.